for your VINformation

Since this blog is all about me, Vinnie, and right now, Vinnie is all about losing weight and making himself a more marketable actor, Vinnie would like to put a button on the discussion and move on with his life.

There is no cure to what I have.

There is no pill.

There is no magic potion.

What I have ahead of me is a lifetime of hard work and dedication. The choices will be laid out in front of me, and I’ll be forced, everyday, to make the correct ones.

There is no laurel resting when it comes to bulge-battling; no off-days, no vacations. The road is long and the ride is hard but the payoff rocks.

By making my private battles public, I’d hoped to inspire those around me and keep myself honest – I’ve done both; so now, it’s time for this blog to go back to being about Vinnie acting, not just getting himself ready to be an actor…for, alas, there’s no cure for that fever either.

Reflections.

If you live in NYC, one is inundated with reflections.

Today, as I walked from the DMV – where the clerk insisted I get a new driver’s license picture taken because, as she noted, “…honey, you almost haff  dis size now…” – I caught a glimpse of myself and didn’t see a fat guy glimpsing back.

I’m not fat and misshapen; pretty average, I’d say, and really, isn’t that all we really want?

On Superbowl Sunday, I watched the Hoarders mini-marathon on A&E; I was more interested in the one lady living in her own feces and the other lady living amongst four tons of trash then the Saints and Colts.

I started thinking top myself, “There, but for the grace of God, go I.”

My parents, while not hoarders to the extreme of the folks featured on the program, are hoarders nonetheless who taught me to never throw anything out, “…you’ll never know when you’ll need it…”

Over the course of the last few years, I stopped thinking like that and started cleaning out my life, a surprising side-affect was the favorable way it affected my thinking about holding on to everything, including my body-fat and I got rid of most of that as well.

And while I did clean out my closet and dresser drawers months ago when I hit my goal weight, I kept the bags of fat clothes in my basement storage area; I felt I needed to keep them, “…just in case…”

Let’s think about that for a moment.

Just in case of what, exactly?

Just in case I allow myself to gain back all the weight I lost, I wouldn’t have to spend any money on new big clothes?

What kind of thinking is that?

Negative thinking!

So, 8:00 pm, Sunday, February 7, 2010, I went down to basement and hauled everything up from the basement and out to the trash for pick-up.

I didn’t donate it to charity, I didn’t call a fat friend to give it away and I didn’t care. I needed those bags of clothes out of my life at that very moment.

When I turned the lock on the basement door, I felt a wave of freedom splash across my being. In the moments it took to climb the stairs and settle into my favorite chair for another episode of Hoarders and I’ll never need clothes that big again.

Vinnie Costa, over-reactor, has struck again.

When Vinnie sets his mind to something he usually sticks with it, for better or worse, today he was just treated rudely one too many times by the good folks at the Weight Watchers center in Midtown to put up with it anymore.

When a center is scheduled to close at 2:00pm, I don’t expect it to be closed at 1:45 and then made to feel like I was in the wrong.

Now listen, I loved WW and appreciate everything they’ve done for me, but I’m done. I’ve been following the program, working it, and making it work for me, for over a year and believe I can now start do it by myself. I believe I’m strong enough to deal with the emotional eating issues I’ve built up of the years and I feel as if now, finally at 41, at 35 I can start being responsible for my own actions. It’s time to be accountable for myself.

I left the center, called the main office and canceled my membership – I don’t need to pay $40.00 a month to get nothing but stress.

I’ve been working very hard to maintain the 50 pound weight loss, even starting an exercise program that is far to advanced for me and if I can’t get the support I need from the people I’m paying, why am I putting money in their pockets?

My goodness, sometimes it seems the drama just creates itself…

It’s so much easier getting fat!

According to my bathroom scale I weigh 185 pounds. I’m trying to lose another ten lbs and goddammit, I’m goin’ do it – watch out world get off-a my runway…

I registered a 1.2 pound loss this week; for a total re-lost of 3 pounds.

I currently tipping the scales at 187.4 pounds, which would be a perfect weight for me if I were 6′2″ but at my current resume height of 5′8″ – my goodness is there any number I won’t tell a lie about? – I’m still a little “chubby” for my tastes.

Two more pounds and I’ll be comfortably back in my mediums and 34s, the fat pants banished, this time,  forever the tide is staying out.

I wanted a lite snack with my afternoon coffee so I bought an Blueberry Oat Bar with Organic Blueberries from Starbucks – only $2.25.

At only 250 calories, I thought it was a wise choice.

Seeing that I’m a’countin’ POINTS, I went to the Starbucks website to find the rest of the nutritional information I needed in which to calculate it’s value – total fat and fiber.

While it is high in fiber – 4 grams – it’s also very high in fat – 10 grams (!). The second ingredient listed; butter.

So, this little snack is 5 POINTS – to put that in perspective, a regular sized bag of plain M & M’s is 5 POINTS.

Now, it’s just sitting there, taunting me, and I don’t want to eat it.

Today’s lesson: Find out the POINTS before you buy the seemingly healthy snack…

“The tide goes out and the tide comes in.”

The above, is a phrase the fatties in my little group of friends like to say when one of us loses weight. The “tide” being fat.

After maintaining my 50 pound weight loss for four months, I’ve re-gained 10 pounds – as of this morning, I weigh 190.4 and I gotta tell you, I hate it.

I am going to stop the tide from coming back – my one resolution for twenty-zen was to become a better person – I’m better thinner… and the difference between 180 and 190 on me is the difference between Medium and large and I’ve already gotten rid of all my fat clothes

What I don’t want, is to end up dying of a heart attack at age 42 and being found days later in ill-fitting clothes because I’ve grown out of my mediums… and the cats have eaten off half my face because as y’all know I don’t keep the dry food bowl filled all the time…

So, as of today, I’ve re-enlisted the help of Weight Watchers to build the necessary food levees – ’cause the tide is NOT coming in anymore!

…as we dive head first into Autumn, my favorite season of the year – another reasons to pack it all in and open a bakery in Vermont, their Fall seems to last longer – I’m finally beginning to understand the joy that comes from layering.

Layering clothes that is.

Fifty pounds ago, I would leave the house in a tee-shirt and sweat jacket, it was my uniform. Now, it’s tee-shirt, dress shirt, vest, tie…the works!

I love it, I feel like I get to play dress-up, wearing a pair of pants that are actually my size helps a lot, but that’s neither here nor there… (for those keeping track, I’m wearing a 34/30, who knew this is what it feels like to not have your pants dig into your waist? Or to wear a tie and not feel like my neck is in a noose… WOW!

It also affords me the chance to wear all the browns and greens I’m so fond of wearing and not look out of place – the whole world wears earth tones in Fall…

I love the Fall – especially when the Yankees are in the World Series!

I became a lifetime member of Weight Watchers.

What that means – from weightwatchers.com:

Lifetime Membership is a valuable privilege you receive after completing your weight loss journey as a Weight Watchers Meetings member. Lifetime membership is only for Meetings members. You receive a Lifetime Membership recognition award when you achieve a weight goal that is within the Weight Watchers Healthy Weight Ranges (or a healthy weight determined by your physician) and are at least 5 pounds less than your initial weight recorded at your first Weight Watchers meeting. After six consecutive weeks of paid Meetings membership within 2 lbs (above or below) of your weight goal, you’re awarded Lifetime membership… As a Lifetime Member, we encourage you to attend Weight Watchers Meetings — at no charge and – as long as you are no more than 2 pounds above your weight goal — in your local area and anywhere in the world…

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I didn’t suck in my gut in all day…that’s huge, not my gut, the fact I don’t need to keep it sucked in…

Ok, now that I’ve lost 47 pounds and am three pounds below goal, I need a whole new wardrobe. I have nothing to wear! Everything is to big and baggy and the last thing I can spend money on right now is new clothes…

So, I was thinking – mayhaps if someone would nominate me for What Not To Wear…just puttin’ it out there…

If you need pictures let me know…

After nine months and one week on Weight Watchers and loosing 47 pounds total, I am proud to say, “I’ve met my goal.” Actually, not only met it, but passed it by three pounds!

I’m currently 177 pounds – ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY-SEVEN POUNDS!

Unreal!

When I started Weight Watchers, my original goal was 195 – I hadn’t been thinner than that in years and felt it was a good “healthy” weight to be at to continue my lucrative career as a character actor – I certainly didn’t believe I could make it down to the BMI chart weight of 134-164 for someone my height – 5′ 8″ it’s what’s on my resume and it’s the story I’m tellin’ -  it wasn’t until I visited the doctor and we figured out 180 was a healthier alternative for someone who’d been considered “big-boned” his entire life that a goal I set could actually be attainable.

I’m quite proud of my accomplishment, 47 pounds is nothing to sneeze at, but the hard work is far fom over – next up: maintenince!

I need to maintain this weigh – within 2 pounds up or down – for six weeks to get my “lifetime” membership in Weight Watchers and never have to pay for a meeting again – it would also be the time I could apply for a job as a leader and change up the survival job landscape.

Some Random Thoughts:

• Even though your clothes are smaller, you don’t pay less and have a harder time finding your size…
• Sitting in the two-seater seats on the bus and not touching shoulders with your neighbor is nice…
• Quality food tastes better than quantity of food…
• Wearing tight clothes can be enjoyable…
• It takes less booze to get drunk…
• It’s easier to be a nasty/funny fattie than it is to be a nasty/funny skinny – nasty/funny skinny people are just nasty…

When I weighed in at 182.0 lbs, it made me very happy A total weight loss of 42.6 lbs. I’m not quite there, but I’m so close I can taste it – I’m hoping, within the next two weeks or so, I’ll be celebrating reaching my goal…

In honor of my accomplishment, I give you, FAT VINNIE:

This is how I looked most of my life…

…and this is the way I look today:

After a four weeks of steady gains and two weeks of not wanting to know, Vinnie is back down where he belongs!

I lost 5.2 lbs putting me back at a nice round 40 pounds gone, actually 40.2 pounds gone!

I currently weigh 184.2 pounds. Only 4.2 pounds away from my goal weight of 180. Who would’ve thunk it? – Vinnie IS almost skinny!

As I get closer and closer to my goal, the struggle gets harder and harder – isn’t it supposed to be the other way around?

LOOK, I HAVE CHEEK BONES! WHO KNEW?

Weight management is a war, with battles waged three meals a day.

        – Vinnie Costa